I Hope We Dance
by analise17
Summary: "Under the streamers and low lighting with the disco ball reflecting off silver balloons of moons and stars she was finally in his arms." Isabel chooses to connect with Alex and history is changed. (Takes place during "Heart of Mine").
1. Chapter 1

Note: Some people might consider the alien psychic connection as a metaphor for sex: I don't; I consider it a vehicle for intimacy yes, but in a purer more revealing sense than simply erotic. Hence this story does not condone underage sex or sex outside of marriage. Just know that I'm not going there and enjoy the sandbox that might have been should Colin Hanks have not gotten a lead role on another show thereby allowing the character of Alex Whitman to live on.

i.e. I own nothing.

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Chapter 1: Cheating

Ever since he'd gone to Sweden and returned Alex Whitman had changed; He had a pen pal – a girl he had feelings for – whereas he kept his distance to the point of almost avoiding herself but it was his behavior that she noticed the most. He'd grown more confident and apart from the group except for his lasting friendships with Liz and Maria.

There was a time when he would look at her – Isabel Evans – like she was the only one in the room. He'd study her sometimes shyly as if she were a mystery to unravel; he'd gravitate to her side in a crowd or return her gaze whenever she looked at him during their group meetings. But now Alex was closed off. Oh it was attractive – the "unattainable male," "the one who got away" but it was more than that to her.

 _She missed her friend_. The guy who would hang out with her, be a fool just to make her laugh (like at her birthday party), the one guy outside of Max and Michael she actually knew – who not only knew her secret but didn't run away and instead stayed close. Yes, the drama and danger could easily suck someone in and Maria and Liz were also involved so he was there to support and protect them. However the more she watched and grew to know him she realized what a singular person he had become – and still was becoming.

But something had changed: he had left. Her friend, her rock, the guy who wore his heart on his sleeve and despite all of her insistences that they could never _be_ in a relationship but kept _being there_ just walked away for months. Who didn't send emails or letters to her and just came back acting as if their friendship hadn't mattered or he hadn't missed her which cut deeper than she'd wanted to admit.

And seeing all of the couples growing closer with prom, her almost begging Alex to take her and then him in that debonair tux Isabel realized that he would keep changing. Changing, and growing, and finally – eventually – leaving. Because she was tied to Roswell – Max, Michael, the granolith – and he wasn't. Alex would one day go to college on some amazing scholarship across the country to learn computer science and music theory and only come back to this sleepy town on vacations and maybe pop in to say "hi" if she was even lucky.

And if she kept holding him at arm's length he really would leave without a backwards glance. Maybe she was more like Michael than she wanted to admit. But hadn't even overly-cautious Michael been trying to open up to Maria because he too was afraid of losing her?

That's why tonight here at prom she wanted to change. Screw destiny. Screw Max and Michael and their hesitations and their "E.T. phone home" attitudes. She wanted to live – here on Earth – and she wanted Alex to be able to really see her.

Under the streamers and low lighting with the disco ball reflecting off silver balloons of moons and stars she was finally in his arms. He was finally looking at her through those beautiful deep eyes and her emotions just overflowed.

Insides shaking she took a leap, "Alex, I'm going to do something I said I wouldn't do."

Hesitantly, almost apprehensively he answered. "Don't." She could take it as rejection but she wasn't going to accept that tonight, not when she truly knew that if she gave him all of her heart it would make him, and also her, so happy.

So instead Isabel leaned in slowly and gently kissed him. He could have evaded it. He could have turned his head so she would kiss his cheek. But instead he let it happen.

As though coming awake from a dream they both opened their eyes to once again stare at one another until shyly he glanced away before looking back at her again. "I told you not to do that."

A beat. Then this time he met her in the kiss half-way. And then the world was perfect. Soft music and light, his warm strong arms and hands around her, her hand barely cradling the back of his neck with just a whisper of a touch, his lips gentle and loving against hers and she never wanted this night to end.

As they broke apart before a chaperone could chastise them they drew closer with her head on his shoulder. Closing her eyes as she felt his body heat through his evening jacket, and although she didn't want to lose one moment, or cut anything short she didn't want to lose her nerve. Maybe it was too soon but once again…she needed to try.

She leaned over and whispered in his ear "Do you want to get some air? I want to show you something."

He pulled back giving her a puzzled, almost wary expression "what is it?"

She gave him a radiant smile to put him at ease, and for once it felt entirely natural. He was the one she could always be herself around and this was something that she wanted to trust him with it. And so she asked him. "Do you trust me?"

It worked. He relaxed and returned the smile knowing it wasn't a cruel blow coming and she felt a twinge at how contrary she'd been with him in the past. He offered her his arm and escorted her off the floor and out of the transformed cafeteria. Entering the darkened hallways she noticed Max and Tess sitting together out of the corner of her eye. Alex didn't seem to notice them and she wanted the love triangle soap opera to be less than center stage for once in her life, so she kept going with him and turned the corner to walk down the hallway into an empty classroom.

Looking into the dim space he couldn't hold a comment back "Isabel... this is the sophomore English Lit room that I saw last year – all of last year in fact."

She went to the back of the classroom to get out of sight of the door's narrow window so they wouldn't be interrupted and she could hear him follow her. Once she got to the third to last line of desks she turned abruptly and let her eyes adjust so she could read his fact in the darkness. Searching it she felt her nervousness abate at what she was about to offer, about what she was leaving herself open to from him. She could feel herself sweating and wiped her palms on her dress and willed herself to calm down.

"Alex, we've known each other a long time. You're the only one who gets me – who was even willing to get to know me. I trust you and I want to show you something." She could see how confusing she was making this by the awkwardness that his face betrayed. This wasn't going well at all! She was getting more and more scared by the second and maybe she shouldn't have been so vague and now he was really, _really_ confused or thought that she'd had too much punch and finally she just let out an exasperated "UGH!" That got a two eyebrow raise from him. "Alex-"

"Isabel," bringing a hand over his face he sighed "you're making us both nervous. Why don't you just tell me what this is about?"

She closed her eyes and breathed. "That's the problem. I'm no good with words and I keep everyone at a distance." She looked up at the ceiling trying to collect her thoughts. "I'm always following Max, or tempering Michael's paranoia but I don't really take action on my own so this is kind of new for me." Here it goes. "I want to try to connect with you. I want you to see me – all of me – I-I trust you. I love you, Alex."

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AN: I'm team Dreamer all the way but I had to get this out of my system because: angst. The first time I ever liked Isabel or was impressed by Katherine Heigl's acting was the scene of Alex's dream of dancing with Isabel. So in a way, he's been the one to frame her in my mind as not only being beautiful but the fact that she could be even more as a person.


	2. Chapter 2: Like a Flower

Chapter 2 Like a Flower

He looked…speechless. But that was also the problem. It seems he really _was_ speechless.

"A-Alex? Are you ok?"

Blinking he must have realized that she was waiting for his reaction. "Isabel, I'd be honored – but I don't want you to feel that you have to do this. I'm happy, _so happy_ , that you love me and I don't want to push you into this."

During his words she had been holding her breath and now she expelled all her fears from her lungs "I'm not. Alex, I want to share this with you. I want you to know me like no one else has. This isn't out of some looming need; there's no crisis, just you… and me." Before he could interrupt her she forced out the rest quickly "and you don't even have to show me anything, I wouldn't betray your privacy, it can just be one-way. I just…wanted to share it with you."

The last words were whispered as she saw his eyes change to an expression of awe. _This_ was her Alex, the one who would do anything for her, the one who wasn't afraid to love her, the one who had left and hadn't returned fully …until now.

She could feel her tears filling as she saw the mirroring gleam in his own eyes. Her Alex gave her the sweetest smile – a full sunrise which she'd only seen shadows of previously. "Yes, Isabel. Please show me," he drew her close halfway with her elbows and met her halfway again and she mirrored his actions. Leaning down he brought his forehead to hers causing her to close her eyes in safety and whispered to her "I want you to see me too."

"Are you sure… a-about both? I don't know if it will even work or if I can control it and you might not like what you see and I don't know if I will be able to control what I see from you either."

"That's ok on both accounts." She could hear the smile in his voice and feel the change of facial expressions from being so close to him. "Why don't we try one at a time?"

She barely nodded against him. Then taking a deep breath she drew a bit away and tentatively slid her hands up his arms and shoulders to cradle his face in both of her hands and looked directly in his eyes which too had opened to meet hers. His hands had come around her waist to steady her.

Before when she had kissed him on his doorstep in desperation she'd been afraid but determined. But now she felt at peace, because this is what she wanted for herself, because this was her wanting to give instead of get. There was no pressure of an outcome except the sharing itself so Isabel hoped it would work better this time.

She thought back to where she wanted to start and evened her breathing as she gazed up at the man she loved. Then she tried picturing a box opening to release her inner thoughts, memories and feelings.

Before what had felt like an impenetrable barrier was now soft and light like a curtain of feathers that she easily passed through; she reached out to him with her mind …and her heart. Something in him startled and he tried to pull back minutely but the connection had already been made and it seems once he recognized it was her he began to relax.

Was that a normal response? Max and Liz had done this before and he never mentioned that but the connection seemed to strengthen and as it took hold it seemed to have a will of its own.

Before she realized it her thoughts we flowing and by his gasp she knew he was seeing what she was thinking: coming out of the pod with Max, the wide New Mexico sky pierced with starlight, holding hands and walking down the road on that chilly night, the headlights that cut through the darkness – the brightest thing she'd ever seen – and the first people she'd ever seen: the kind faces of her mother and father, the Evans. A coat thrown around her and another around Max, the days of Child Protective Services, the orphanage, Philip and Diane Evans visits and the paperwork.

Coming to a house and living there, finally it becoming home, going to school, and somehow knowing that she and Max were different. Scared and alone, finding Michael in the cafeteria and knowing that he was the same. Hanging out the three of them where they could be themselves and never letting anyone into their inner circle. Being snubbed at school and then snubbing in turn. Hiding behind fashion magazine trends and using alien powers to adjust her wardrobe and constantly paranoid that someone would see through her farce of perfection.

Her panic at hearing about Max healing Liz and then the Sheriff following them, Max's crazy behavior when it came to Liz, Michael flying off the handle, dreamwalking Maria, dreamwalking him – seeing them dance in his dream – the feeling of awe that dancing with her _was_ his dream –, meeting him at the soap factory and what she had actually been thinking and feeling, her words to Max in the jeep.

The images came faster and faster until she could almost only catch bits and pieces as they subconsciously linked together to form a picture of her life. Tess's arrival, Max kidnapped, the granolith, the recording of her real mother, the weight of destiny, Whittaker's attack, Vilandra's betrayal, Nicholas, the Duplicates.

Images kept flowing but somehow they felt sluggish through the connection and it seemed to take a great deal of effort to send them to him. Finally it came to the months when Alex was gone and how much she had missed him and how she didn't let anyone see her cry when she heard how he'd contacted Maria or Liz and not her.

Most importantly: how she saw Alex, that she loved unbuttoning that top button, that she liked his longer hair; how she noticed how good he was as they grew up, and in the short time they'd been friends how happy she was to see him, how safe and loved she felt, how his face had become dear to her, how afraid she was of ruining their friendship or having to leave someone behind; how she had been torn in two between building a life here and leaving to save a planet. And how she felt in the last few days, asking him to ask her to prom, her fear and courage for kissing him on the dance floor, her jubilation that he returned it and right now feeling so whole that she could share all of this with him.


	3. Chapter 3: Jericho

Chapter 3 Jericho

Slowly the room came back into focus and she could see Alex's eyes center on the here and now as well. He was breathing hard and perspiration gleamed on his forehead and his pale face felt cold in her hands. Suddenly she began to fear she had shown him more than he could physically handle. She called his name and was relieved to see his smile emerge.

"Is that how you really see me?" Absently she nodded. He swayed and when she caught him he gave a little laugh "I think I need to sit down."

Quickly she supported him around his back and guided him to a desk chair, crouching before him. "I'm sorry Alex, I should have cut it off. Are you alright? Can I check?" He nodded and she carefully reached to feel his heart and used her power to search him over. Everything seemed normal – just strained. There was no tale-tell sign pointing to a specific problem and she removed her hand from his heart to softly hold his hand. Waiting and watching as he placed his head between his knees she remembered the party. "Do you think some punch will help?"

The hand that had held hers loosely now gripped firmly. "No. Don't leave. I don't want you to leave." Shakily he lifted his head to meet her eyes and instead she sat on the floor which earned her another smile. As a gentleman he always kept his eyes looking at her neck or above and this was no different. "Thank you, I saw it, all of it – I think – it will probably take some time to process it but Isabel…" as his words cut off his hand gently reached out to cup her cheek and smooth away her frown of concern "you are so beautiful. Inside and out you are the most beautiful girl I have ever known. And I want you to know that I want you to see – " when he saw she would interrupt he placed his thumb to barely touch her lips. "Please Isabel; I want you to see me."

She took his hand and kissed his palm. "We have lots of time. It's late and we're both tired – I'm sorry, I didn't think it would hurt you."

His eyebrows were furrowed together in concentration and she knew he was thinking something over in his mind. "You're not tired. Only I'm tired. Why is that?" It wasn't an accusation, just a simple statement, and although she was glad he was feeling well enough to rationalize she didn't want him to reason with her about continuing.

"I don't know; I didn't hear anything from Max about this. Maybe I just shared too much detail. Were you feeling well earlier?" Color was returning to his face and he had stopped sweating which helped to ease the knot in her gut.

"I felt fine even when we were dancing. Max and Liz did this before right? They didn't have any problems – at least Liz glossed over them if they had. So why me then?" It was the question she had ignored and she busied herself checking him over. His breathing had evened and when she checked his pulse it was a steady rhythm. Gently grasping her hand that had taken his pulse at his neck he pulled it down and held both of hers in both of his to demand her full attention. "What's wrong Isabel?"

When she wouldn't meet his eyes he changed his grip to allow both of her hands which rested meekly in his one and he tipped her chin barely to have her meet his gaze. "That scared me and I don't know what's wrong." She confessed. "What if it was me who did that to you? What if I just can't control it?" Her voice betrayed her as for the second time this evening her eyes started to cloud.

"Hey, it's alright. I'm alright" he soothed her, caressing her hair slightly. "Maybe it's a fluke, maybe everyone is different – this is uncharted territory, at least I hope it is!"

She laughed despite herself. "You _know_ it is!" He really must be feeling better if he could make her laugh like that, not that he wouldn't try otherwise. As she looked him over he appeared fine – a little tired but no more than a teenager who had danced the night away. She remembered his reaction at the beginning. "When I started, you almost panicked, what happened?"

Now his hands framed her face and her own rested on his knees between them. Once again he carefully considered her question. "I'm not sure. I think it just scared me – but I don't know why. It was like I'd felt that before – someone in my head – and I hadn't liked it but once I knew it was you – felt it was you – I was alright." At her own look of confusion, he shook his head. "That doesn't make sense but somehow it keeps coming to my mind."

The thought that presented itself was troubling, but to not voice it would be worse. "What if someone has …connected you or psychically affected you before? Do you think that is possible?"

Alex answered with a wry smile "with everything that goes on around here I would say anything is possible, but I don't know if that's a consolation. But if that is the case I need you to check. Isabel – we know that my mind will accept you, you might be the only person able to find out what going on in there: a clue, a discrepancy."

She didn't feel comfortable with that. "But what about Max? He's had more practice than I have and then if it is me we'll know because you won't have the same reaction."

"I don't know if I really want Max poking in my head which will be filled with the memories I've been thinking of recently." There was a hint of a joke in his voice but it almost fell flat. "that is unless you _want_ Max to be teasing you for years about it and me constantly being ribbed and glared at every day."

Max was a bad idea – he could be overprotective without even needing an excuse, Michael had never delved into that side of his power which left one other besides herself. "What about Tess?"

As if someone had slapped him Alex reared back tense and defensive, looking in the distance "Not Her!" He was panting again, and Isabel held very still afraid that he might pass out or hurt himself with whatever was happening. Shaking his head as if to clear it he finally found her on the floor as if he had forgotten she was there. His eyes pled with her – for what she wasn't sure. "Just you, Isabel – only you."

And then he blinked and was fine. He gave her a tired smile continued as if it never happened. "Max being in my head would just be awkward. I trust you Isabel."

"Ok. But I want to wait, can we do it tomorrow?" He was scaring her – not for her own safety but for his. Something very strange was going on and she didn't know how to approach it. It was getting late and the prom would be ending soon; Max was their ride home and she was afraid of making Alex walk any distance like this.

"I need to know what is going on. This is weird, and it's my head – you know? I don't want to sound the danger alarm with the whole group just yet, and it might be nothing…" It made sense, and that scared her on top of everything else. People didn't usually depend on her. Max would come to her for emotional support but when it came to action and planning she let him take the lead. It looked like there was no other option. "Just check for me, ok? If it gets crazy we'll circle the wagons and get the whole group working on it, but I'd rather bring it up on more than a hunch."

Giving in she nodded. His tight smile turned to a light frown as he noticed her feet crouching in the high heels. "That' can't be comfortable."

Ignoring her puzzled brow the change in subject he stood before she could stop him. Offering her his hand Alex helped her up and then turned another desk for her to sit in without having to reach too far. Sitting in from of him she gave her ultimatum. "If anything happens, tell me to break the connection, promise me! I'll try to go slow and ask along the way but I'm not sure how well this will work."

Her hands had come up to cup his face once more and he brought his own over hers and rubbed one softly with his thumb. "I promise. And I want you to see me – it's only fair" he teased again. She nodded and evened her breathing once more. "So, how do we do this anyway?"


	4. Chapter 4: Lock

Chapter 4 Lock

Isabel smiled. "First: _relax,_ Alex!" He nodded. "Second: decide where you want the memories to start – that might help guide it – and then picture something opening and letting your mind open with it."

She carefully reached out with her mind and was met with his this time. But something was off – the colors were muddy. Was Alex colorblind? No- reds and greens were there but everything was muted. The "sound" of his memories was off, almost straining in and out of focus and the feelings were hazy. If anything Max had told her how vivid and sharp Liz's memories had been when he had been healing her and she had barely been conscious. Even when she'd dreamwalked Alex last year it was bright and alert with his subconscious.

Alex always amazed her with his quiet strength and quick wit. Seeing his childhood was wonderful and once again she was floored at how from the moment she stepped off the school bus on her and Max's first day in first grade Alex had seen her – almost been entranced by her. In his eyes she was beautiful, radiant and vivacious. He noticed the little things about her: how sometimes she had let her ice queen mask slip, or when she was kind to someone when she thought no one had noticed. It was so complimenting how respectfully he viewed her just as he had in his dream. Simply put he liked her, and he wished she would notice him. He thought that he could be a good friend to her, if only she would see him.

Perhaps more than most Alex had felt like an outcast amongst his peers – awkward and misunderstood. But instead of focusing on his insecurities he had tried hard to make others feel involved and relied heavily on Maria and Liz as support as he reached to branch out and try new things; sometimes succeeding, sometimes failing – but always trying and always honest.

Focusing outside of the connection she thought he might have started sweating again but he seemed to be alright and his breathing was steady so she continued. High school: music taking stage in his life, his growing friendship with Liz and Maria and his hurt over being used to switch out Max's blood. His awe that she had approached him about the party, his reaction to her unbuttoning that top button the first time and then meeting her there and the real anger at once again being used. How alone he felt with Liz and Maria lying to him and then feeling mocked by her. The shock of learning the truth and how his world had changed and how he was finally actually close to her, that they shared something and that she started to rely on him. How every day was a lesson in joy and torment as they dance near but never crossed that line. That her smile struck him dumb for the first month until he finally got used to it shinning his way and started feeling it was actually deserved… and truly returned it. His awe that she trusted him to hold her as she sought out Max with her powers when he asked and the loneliness this past summer brought when they were fractured by the message.

The return of the school year and the embarrassment of dancing like a nut in front of her mother but how he didn't regret it to see her smile and laugh so hard. Then a barrier reared up before her and she felt herself cry out in pain as though she had ran headlong into a slippery steel wall – except the wall kept pushing into her. Outside she heard a muffled groan echoing her own and she realized that it was Alex's mind that was trying to pull her _through_ the wall. Stars exploded behind her eyelids instead of the flow of images and she mentally flailed for a connection around or a way to go back. Slowly she found one and relived Alex telling Liz that he had got into his –

Again her mind bruisingly slammed into the same barrier and a whispered gasp beat upon her ears. Orienting herself somehow she tried once more to find a connection that would go around it. She fed him the suggestion of herself just in case and found a memory of her talking with him after he had returned from his trip.

His trip from – She avoided the word just in case it brought them back to the wall.

Instead she tried to trace it backwards to find the other side of the barricade but she kept getting confused as pieces were missing and tangled. Everyone showed up in fragments – his parents. Kyle, Liz, Maria, Max, herself, even Michael and Sheriff Valenti, but someone was missing. Searching outside of the connection she heard both her own and his ragged breathing and Isabel knew that she needed to stop.

In one last effort Isabel tried another strategy; thinking of the missing person as only a face and not the associated name brought glimpses of the teenage girl around their group of friends and strange glances of her short figure with waves of curly blond hair out of the corner of his eye. Suddenly the flow of images slowed to show one memory in almost perfect clarity – the only memory from this time in his life of any duration she can find.

Sitting in his own room at the computer after a day of school. He turns to the door and calls for someone to come in but it seems they won't enter. Standing he crosses the room to open the door and finds himself staring into shorter blue eyes framed with blonde hair. A wave of fear, despair and anger washed over Isabel through the connection as the wall slammed down once more hard enough to fling her mind free.

Isabel came to reality to hear her own cry echoing in her ears and Alex collapsed forward into her arms with a groan.


	5. Chapter 5: From Afar

Chapter 5 From Afar

After several minutes his strained voice strung through the air. "Isabel, _what's wrong with me?_ " His eyes were closed and breathing came in shallow gasps as his head lay in her lap.

Swallowing she made her voice as calm as possible. "I'm getting Max, Alex. I can't do this alone. I saw him earlier – I won't be more than a minute."

Griping him firmly by the shoulders she used all of her strength to pull him up and rested his arms, upper torso and head on the desk affixed to the school chair. She had to strain to hear his words "Don't leave me…" and then he was unconscious.

Struggling to get up she finally toppled her own chair and desk and ran for the door. It felt as though days had passed between their memories inside the dim room, but outside prom was in full swing. Praying, she sprinted as fast as her heels would let her down the hallway that stretched back to the cafeteria. Her lungs were burning and her feet screaming from the abuse in the high heels but all that mattered was that she found Max and Tess still sitting together gazing into each other's eyes.

"Max!" The music drowned out most of her yell but it must have been enough as he turned away from the blonde to look at her. "I need you! Now! It's Alex!"

Not giving him time to argue or ask she turned knowing that he would follow. Sure enough he caught up to her in less than a minute.

He shot questions as he ran with her "What's wrong? Where are we going?" Trust Max to not wait when someone needed him.

She could hear a second set of heels and knew that Tess was behind them, which meant that she had only a short time to give him as much information as possible. "Sophomore English Lit room. He collapsed. Something's wrong with him we were connecting –"

"Connecting? Why –"

She cut him off. "There's no time! There's something wrong with his mind, there's this barrier, I don't think he ever went to Sweden. I think he's been mind-warped."

"By the Skins?" That was the most probably explanation.

"No." She gauged how far the tip tap of heels were and decided that she would take the risk and stared her brother straight in the eyes and pitched her voice as low as possible. "By Tess."

His reaction was no surprise "What? Are you crazy?"

"No I'm not." They'd reached the door and she flung it open. And then it slammed close while she groped in the darkness for the desks "I saw her in his room, I think the memory was only there because it took him a moment to realize it was her. Then his memories were blocked again – Alex!"

It took a moment for her eyes to adjust to the dark of the room once more and then to find him. He had fallen out of the chair onto the floor in a crumpled heap and now he lay where her desk had stood. She dropped beside him to check if he was awake or physically hurt from his collapse and heard the door swing open again.

A voice she was loathed to hear grated on her ears "Max?! What's going on? What's wrong Isabel?"

Fighting back tears Isabel turned and whispered to her brother who too had come to help her on the floor with their friend _"keep her away from him!"_

Max seemed almost frozen in shock beside her so she went back to tending to Alex by straightening out his limbs on the floor and checking his joints and head with her first aide training knowledge. Finally Max's voice rang out with authority "Tess, we need Michael – and everybody. Just bring everyone here right away. And bring some water."

On hearing him use the young woman's name Isabel covered Alex's ears and prayed for the second time that night – this time that it was too dark for Tess to see and that he hadn't heard it. She didn't want anyone inadvertently doing any more damage to Alex's psyche after what she'd put him through earlier.

"Of course. I'll be right back." And thankfully she was gone.

After the door opened and slammed shut again. Max turned to get a better look at the young man who had been dancing so happily with his sister earlier. "Ok, we have a minute. What's going on, Iz?"


	6. Chapter 6: Holding on to You

Chapter 6 Holding onto You

She took a deep breath and check Alex's pulse and breathing again. He was pale and his face was drawn as if in pain but she forced herself to focus and talked as quickly as she could trying not to ramble too much from the shock. "I asked Alex to ask me to Prom. Ever since he came back from his trip he'd been distant and I was afraid that his feelings had changed. But he humored me and we were having such a good time and I didn't want to lose him without at least trying – or at least letting him know how much I care for him – so I asked him if he trusted me then I brought him here and asked him if I could show him, well, me. And he said yes and he said he wanted me to see him too. And when we first connected I was able to show him everything but at first he panicked then afterwards he was exhausted, Max, and I wanted to take him home and I was scared I had done something wrong."

Her brother's faced mirrored her own concern from earlier. She barreled on. "And we thought about it and then, Max, I-I asked him why he was so afraid at the beginning and he said he had felt like someone had done that to him before but he couldn't remember who. I suggested he try it with someone else like you or _her_ but once I mentioned her name he just freaked out for a minute. He yelled 'Not Her' like he was afraid of her or she was dangerous and it was almost like I wasn't in the room. But then just a minute later he acted as if it hadn't happened."

She was gasping for air as she knew she was probably almost out of time. Any minute they would all come through that door and she didn't know if that would help or not, if nothing else it would be a sensory overload for him let alone for her jangled nerves. "But he still insisted that I check and so I did and when we got to this last year of high school when he went t-to" She glanced down and found him firmly, and troublingly, still unconscious. "Sweden there was a wall. Even _the word_ was a wall. And every time we found it we were in mental pain but I think his was worse. And then I tried to find memories associated with people and he had none of Tess except when he didn't think about her or talk to her, except for the one I told you of and at the end of even that memory there was _another wall_. And then he collapsed." She muffled the sob that broke through in her hands.

The door swung wide once more and Michael and Kyle strode into the room. Michael spoke for both of them "What happened?"

On seeing Alex lay prone on the floor Kyle exclaimed "oh no."

Max turned to them both. "I don't know, Iz just told me what happened but I'm not sure of the cause. It sounds like him mind has been tampered with."

"What do you mean?" Kyle asked suspiciously.

"We need to keep this between us four until we know everything that's been going on. We can't jump to conclusions; we need to know instead how to fix the problem." At his words Isabel swung her gaze from Alex's face to Max's. "We don't want anyone else to know – do you understand? Either way it's best to pretend it's something else."

In the silence between the four of them a soft groan was easily heard that made her heart soar. "Isabel?"

"Alex? I'm here!" Holding his hand to keep him grounded she made sure she was in his life of vision.

"What happened?" His speech was barely slurred but it still caused her heart to freeze. "Who else is here?"

"Max and Michael and Kyle. Don't worry you're safe." She soothed him by stroking his hair out of his eyes where it had fallen.

Kyle must have heard despite Alex's faint voice "Liz is still missing so Maria and Tess –"

Alex screamed and curled into a ball on the floor shaking with the effort. He hadn't let go of Isabel's hand causing her to be pulled on top of him. With a look at Max she angled around to hug him from behind and rocked him like a child.

"What is going on here?" Kyle freaked out as softly as possible.

She could tell that Max and Michael were doing their same page communication when a moment passed and Michael replied for Max "Man, shut up."

Isabel tried to help Alex forget about the word, about everything possible as she whispered into his ear and the guys talked around her with low voices while Alex still shook and whimpered in her arms. "It's gonna be ok Alex. You're going to be fine. We're going to get you home; no one's going to hurt you ever again. You're safe now, you're safe." The words flowed effortlessly and she meant each promise with all of her heart. She didn't know if it was time, or her presence and voice but slowly Alex stopped shaking. Once Alex had quieted down and was less tense for a while she felt a hand on her shoulder telling her Max needed her attention. It was only after she had turned to look at him did she realize that she had been crying the whole time she was comforting the dear young man in her arms.

"Iz, I want to see if I can try now." He suggested softly. She could see in her brother's eyes that he was starting to believe her.

Sniffling she nodded. "Just, keep that… " she was at a loss for elegance at the moment so she went with the one that came first to her mind "gerbil away."

Max nodded knowing better to argue about semantics at the moment, "Kyle's doing that right now, they are going to try and find Liz." He tensed at the name but stayed focused on the task at hand.

Looking around she found that indeed Kyle had gone and that she and Alex had been left alone with Max and Michael. "Ok then." Turning to the young man she loved in her arms she called him by name. "Alex? Max wanted to know if he could help you? Will you let him?"

He replied with a shake of his head while still facing away from her. "You Isabel – only you." He murmured.

"I'll be here, I promise I'll be here but I don't know what to do. I need Max's help. Please let him help you."

He rolled over in her arms to come face to face with her and finally noticed Max kneeling right above them. "Oh hey Max. Are you enjoying the dance with Liz?" Looking at Isabel and then Max he asked "why are we on the floor?"

Catching Max's eye she took the lead. "You collapsed after I connected with you and I grabbed Max and he got Michael. Do you remember anything?"

Slowly he started to sit up. She could tell his male pride was a bit hurt but it was a small price to pay in her mind. He closed his eyes while he stretched his neck and rubbed at it with his hand. "I remember coming to the dance, dancing, coming to this room…" abruptly he opened his eyes and looked around the still dim classroom and then back at Isabel with short-lived joy. "We connected. But something happened…and we were trying to figure out what was wrong with me."

He looked around as now Michael had come closer. "So…is someone going to tell me what's wrong with me?"


	7. Chapter 7: The Other Shore

Chapter 7 The Other Shore

It was at that moment that Max's cell phone went off. "Sorry." Moving away towards the room's far corner but his words still filtered back. "Yes, we're still here." "Where are you?" "Thanks for covering." Michael gestured for the phone and Max tossed it to him after telling the listener "One minute."

Coming back he filled them in "Kyle got them home safe. Maria is fine, she's just waiting for Michael and they think you're just ill."

Isabel let out the breath she'd been holding. Turning to Alex she remembered his question. "We think you've been mind-warped, and before we tell you more details we need to fix it so it stops triggering. It seems to keep getting worse each time it's brought up so we just want to get it out. Max wants to try and see if he can heal it – if part of it is physical as well as mental."

Alex looked from her to Max and then back to her again. "Ok, but what 'seems to keep getting worse?'"

Michael got off the phone at that point. "Ok, what's happening?"

"I'm getting worse?" Alex summed up with a question as he looked once again around the room's occupants which were all staring at him.

Michael seemed anxious for action, or something "So what now?"

Max thought for a minute. "You take my cell phone and go back to Maria. If anything else happens we'll call you."

Isabel knew that "anything else" could be from helping carry Alex's unconscious body to tracking down Tess in case she knew they'd figured her our and tried to run – neither of which she wanted to happen despite Tess leaving would delay the problem of what to do with her. She wasn't willing to consider anything worse than that.

Out of the corner of her eye she saw Michael nod and then make his way to the door. Alex turned to Max after it had swung shut. "What about Liz?"

Her brother looked away for a moment as he was wont to do when the girl in question was mentioned. "I don't know. She left me to be with Maria, and now if they can't find her, maybe she went home." Avoiding the disappointment written clearly on Alex's face he made the excuse that she could call or text Michael or Maria should she need a ride. "This is more important." He finished, causing Alex to squirm under his gaze.

Letting out a breath Alex gave her an askew look "this is going to be weird."

Max gave one of his patented half-smiles, "sorry I'm not as attractive as my sister."

"Well I'm not!" Now that the tension had abated Alex seemed more resolved. "How does this even work?"

Isabel looked to Max as well; after all it was his ability. "When I try to heal it's like I can see the damage, something amiss, and I can figure out how to help it fix itself. My power allows the body to make its own repairs, the will that I add acts like a catalyst. I think."

"You think?" Max answered with a shrug. Alex finally relented. "Let's just do this."

Max gave a curt nod and situated himself then removed his jacket – Alex following suit. Reaching out gently he made the connection. She knew he was trying to ignore the images that flowed and focused on the mind behind them. Isabel heard him mutter something about barbed wire and watched as both Max and Alex sweated in concentration.

Alex's face twisted in pain and Max's followed close behind, until she couldn't stand by feeling useless anymore. Hoping it would only help she laid a hand on each of their shoulders to give her added power and comfort. Immediately the connection sprang open once more for her to see from each side what Max was trying to do.

In Max's mind Alex's brain was as tangled as his memories; severed, and tied together again in some places. There were two focuses for these mangled sections – one was a person, another a place. The areas that would connect to the name were cut and diverted whereas the place was shielded in an alias. Isabel could see Max focusing on this shield first, seeking a crack or fissure that would allow him to work from the inside out. Finally coming across a different girl and a name he was able to slip inside.

Isabel was too afraid to follow although her connection with Max allowed her to gain a sense of what was happening. Finding the false memory – and the false picture that allowed it to remain intact for quite some time – Max was able to disconnect the hidden memories inside and bring them outside allowing the shield to become a hollow shell. Outside of the shield a new place had been revealed but these memories and connections were vague although rather complete.

Then, quickly since even she was noticing the drain on herself as well, he worked his way back towards the layers and instances where the name was removed. Uncertain what to do he seemed to waiver before cutting the diverted strings and then pouring his energy to allow Alex's mind to construct the pathways his brain needed to heal its own connections.

Hoping it was enough he, and Isabel with him, withdrew to their own bodies. Both of their shoulders seemed steamy under their dress shirts to Isabel and neither felt very steady.

Hoping for someone else to break the silence she hesitated for several moments. "Max? Alex?...did it work?"

Max once again turned to the other man. "How do you feel?"

Opening his eyes he blinked several times as if the dark room was too much for him. Lifting a hand to his head Alex nodded. "There's been this feeling that something's been off since I came back but I hadn't even realized it until now." Looking up he finally met Isabel's eyes squarely. "It's gone. I feel fine. A-at least I think I feel fine."

Max shakily got to his feet and then offered Alex a hand up. "I think it worked, but if it's alright I'd like to check on you in a couple of days. Right now we need to get home and I need to check in on Tess" before saying the blonde's name he had looked at his sister to warn her.

Alex seemed not to take any notice. "Isabel," he turned to her to help her up in turn and kissed her hand. "Will you forgive me for taking you home early?"

"Under the circumstances I would demand it. But only if I'm allowed to drive – neither of you are in any shape to do so – I don't care how ungentlemanly it may seem." She surprisingly found no objections and they were on their way.


	8. Epilogue: Memory of You

Chapter 8 The Memory of You

Alex stood inside his house staring at the doorway to his room. He knew that once he went in he would probably remember things that had been hidden before and part of that scared him. He was also trying to goad himself to turning the door knob by reminding himself that Isabel had seen enough of him as a basket case and how he couldn't start living in the hallway without his parents dragging him into counseling.

His body and mind felt tired but he was high strung to the point of painful alertness. Holding his breath he opened the door and stepped through. Light from the streetlamps filtered around and the street light cast eerie shadows through his half open blinds on a once familiar place.

Slinging his jacket over a chair he found something niggling in the back of his head as he faced his computer and on his shelf lay the picture that had been taken in Sweden. Picking it up he stared at it in amazement. It looked completely realistic as did the people in the image – one of them a perfect likeness of himself.

A soft knock on his window brought him out of his thoughts and he turned, certain yet surprised to find lovely Isabel Evans looking through the glass. Her "How are you?" mouthed through the glass was revealed as he lifted the slats.

Not capable of holding back a smile in her presence he pulled up the blinds and opened the panes with a flourish. "I don't know what I could have done to deserve two night of the same beautiful woman at my door."

She stood outside almost shyly now dressed warmly in jeans and sweater as she had several nights previously – the night that started everything changing. Trying to hide her embarrassment with skepticism she replied "It's a window Alex."

He could feel the lopsided grin spreading as he answered while helping her over the sill. "Yeah, but 'at my window' sounds creepy." He gave a teasing smirk. "When you said you'd see me later I was thinking more along the lines of tomorrow."

"Well I didn't want to wait that long." Suddenly she was all seriousness. "Really, Alex, how are you?" She gestured to the frame he was holding.

"Confused, and, uh… rather surprised about all of the details I've missed the past months…and about missing, well, the past months." He brought the picture for her to see. "I've never met that girl before. I never flew on an airplane to Sweden or stayed there for months or studied there. But I thought that I did and I have the false memories to prove it."

"Does it hurt?" Her wide eyes were open and ready – to comfort him, to support him and Alex Whitman had a glimpse of what could have been lost, of what he would have missed, should events had taken a different course.

He shook his head in response. "No, it's just fuzzy. Time will tell, but I think –I hope – the worst of it is over. Parts are already starting to come back – I've so much to tell you: where I've been, why I was gone, _what I've learned_."

Just then Isabel's pocket began to vibrate. Bringing out her cell phone she looked at the caller id. "It's Michael using Max's phone." After sharing a look she opened it with apprehension. "Hello? Michael, what's going on?"

Alex turned towards the door and remembered the image of a blonde haired steely blue eyed girl on the other side like a punch to his gut. It made sense now, why he left, why he knew a code he didn't remember making and why he suddenly had memories of alien symbols from the book. And he knew why Michael was calling.

"What do you mean she's gone? I thought Kyle took her back home and was going to watch her?" Isabel turned to Alex to see his serene expression. "Ok, I'll tell Max as soon as I'm home. No – but I will when I am. Let it go for tonight Michael, we'll deal with it later. Oh – and I forgot to tell you how good you looked in a tux…Michael?" Moving the unit away from her ear Alex could hear the hang-up tone. "Well at least that worked."

Shaking his head but grinning at her antics he drew her close and felt her arms sans phone sneak around his waist. "So Tess is gone. Good riddance."

Pulling away to look at him Isabel's surprise was evident "You remember?"

"Yeah, just now" he jutted his chin towards the door.

Her eyes started to fill with tears. "I'm so sorry Alex – we had no idea, we thought we could trust her! I had no idea she was capable of that."

"You have nothing to blame yourself for. You saved me Isabel Evans. And I love you even more for it – if that is even possible." He gave her a heartwarming smile and gently wiped the tears that had escaped down her cheek.

She offered him a watery smile. "And I love you, Alex Whitman – I truly do. I'm sorry it's taken me so long to realize it."

He shook his head. "I'm not. As long as you're with me in the end, I can do anything. I'm not leaving anytime soon."

She beamed back at him and they held each other close as starlight twinkled in from his open window.

There were still challenges to face, and a new enemy unveiled, information to be shared, and stories to be told. But for the first time in their lives Isabel and Alex felt peace inside their hearts. Humming a song's opening bars slightly he took her hand and gave her one more dance for the night; the beginning of many. And in Alex's arms Isabel felt fully at home on Earth.

The End

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AN: And that's a wrap! I hadn't shared this because I got on the Roswell wagon years after the show was over (go Netflix!) and then I ran across the file on my external hard drive and thought "why not spread the joy?" So you have been joyed. :)


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